


i bet on losing dogs

by orphan_account



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Blow Jobs, Clothed Sex, Explicit Consent, Fluff and Smut, Friends With Benefits, Frottage, Humor, M/M, Maid Jeritza, Sexual Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-21
Updated: 2019-11-21
Packaged: 2021-02-12 19:40:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21481747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Byleth asks if Jeritza would like to have sex with him.Jeritza says yes. And then promptly breaks into Byleth's room when he isn't looking.
Relationships: Jeritza von Hrym/My Unit | Byleth
Comments: 21
Kudos: 168





	i bet on losing dogs

**Author's Note:**

> i am so sorry mitski i used your sexy sad song for this ridiculous chad porn i hope you never see this
> 
> this fic features Byleth's POV so like. there's no passion in this. it's still funny tho so give it a chance

Byleth sometimes wishes for the mind numbing blankness of the time before Sothis awakened. It was a monotonous but peaceful existence, with only his father and his men by his side. 

Of course Byleth is now part of something greater than himself, set on a mission to free all of Fódlan one hidden enemy at a time. He does not regret taking Edelgard’s hand, regardless of her anxiety over his loyalty, but sometimes Byleth still longs for the days when he wasn’t set back by something as simple as feelings. 

He’s in his bedroom, the same one assigned to him by Seteth all those years ago. It’s a miracle it did not suffer any damage when so many rooms at the monastery are still uninhabitable. The armor and weapons are still in the same place where Byleth left them this morning and all the mornings before, but there’s a key difference from all these times. 

Today someone is lying down sideways on his bed, face turned towards the door and limbs carefully placed to accentuate their slim figure. 

“...”

Byleth tries to speak but there’s nothing he can say to the sight of Jeritza successfully attempting to seduce him. His mouth hangs open. 

“Hah. Have I… surprised you at last?” The words are said in their usual slow manner, but somehow the pause is a pointed innuendo even as it sounds exactly the same. 

Byleth nods. Jeritza responds with a small pout. “I have no idea why. This was your idea after all…” 

That much is true. After many silent conversations, which consisted of Byleth feeding the monastery cats while Jeritza stood there and stared, Byleth had taken a guess and asked if Jeritza would like to have sex with him. The response had been a pleased smirk and a “perhaps, if I feel like it”. 

Byleth was sure they’d get around to it eventually, so he did not expect to come home after a few rounds of fishing to find Jeritza already in Byleth’s room and spread over his sheets invitingly. 

Byleth realizes how his silence might be interpreted and quickly begins to nod. “Yes, it was my idea.”

Jeritza hums. “Have I made a mistake in coming so soon? Do you… need a moment?”

Shaking his head, Byleth works what he wants to say over his tongue before finally settling on. “We should have sex now.”

Jeritza hums again, this time in approval. “Hmmm, very well… Now that you’ve agreed, I must... prepare myself.”

As he lets Byleth wonder exactly what kind of preparations he’s speaking of, Jeritza gets up from the bed in a single, languid motion and then marches past Byleth to shut the door. He’s wearing a light set of robes, certainly not meant for the battlefield and much likely to be easily taken off. Byleth thinks they look cool to the touch but he’d like to test it himself. 

He moves towards Jeritza, mind set on grabbing him so Byleth can press his fingers against the texture of his clothes but Jeritza dodges expertly. He leans down to grab something under Byleth’s bed and it sets off another chain of thought inside his head. 

Did Jeritza hide something there while waiting alone inside Byleth’s room? He did not agree to any sort of kink play. He is about to question Jeritza when Byleth sees exactly what the man is pulling out from underneath his bed.

'It’s a black cloth' is the first thing Byleth thinks, followed quickly by 'it’s a dress.'

“I want to see you wearing that” is what comes out of his mouth instead. 

Jeritza’s lips quirk up in a satisfied smile as he replies, low voice sensual and unmistakably smug. “I know.”

It’s a maid outfit. 

Jeritza is tall, taller even than Sylvain. Byleth does not know anyone in the cleaning staff who might fit in something like this. Which means… 

Byleth reels at the idea that Jeritza might’ve ordered this costume just for the possibility he’d be asked for a bout of casual sex. Jeritza does not waste time with trivialities and simply tosses his robes away from his body and onto the bed sheets. Then he starts to tackle the matter of getting into the maid dress with a single minded focus usually reserved for the battlefield. 

Byleth looks down and notes Jeritza is hard. Good. It’d be awkward otherwise. Byleth notes he himself is also aching inside his pants. He then follows Jeritza’s example and quickly takes off his clothes, making sure to keep his dagger within reaching distance. You never know when it might be needed after all.

When he looks back, Byleth sees Jeritza has set his hair loose from its usual ponytail. His long, light blond hair spills over his back and an useless frilly tiara sits over the crown of Jeritza’s head. 

Byleth wants to run his fingers through it all and then pull to see which way Jeritza will react. Instead he sits back on his bed, dick hard in the static grip of his right hand, and watches as Jeritza unceremoniously places the satin hair tie on the edge of Byleth’s desk, over old school papers which never got around to being graded. 

Byleth doesn’t mind. He can’t see Edelgard approving of him wasting time on playing around as a professor instead of the war general that he is, although Byleth can’t imagine her approving of him fucking the Death Knight either. 

But it’s not like it’s the Death Knight in front of him now. Byleth had listened to the bursts of information Jeritza had coughed up over meals, tea parties and spars. He’d slowly painted a picture of two different people who just happened to share the same body. At the time Byleth had thought of the green haired Goddess who used to live inside his head and nodded in understanding. 

So he knows the person methodically making his way through a pair of thigh high socks in Byleth’s room is not the one who slew countless Kingdom troupes in the last mission with a swipe of his scythe. Nor is the Death Knight the man covering his erect cock with heavy, black fabric and white frills. Mercedes might have known him as Emile, but for Byleth he is only Jeritza and that is more than enough. 

“Are you ready?” Byleth asks when Jeritza turns to him, all silence and gleaming eyes. 

“Of course.” Jeritza answers, as if he’d go through all this hard work only for the tease of action. 

Instead of resuming any more unnecessary conversations, Jeritza walks the final steps towards Byleth and kneels. 

For all the suspense and waiting around, the first swipe of tongue against his cock takes Byleth by surprise. It’s only a lick, one moment there and the next not. When the hand still gripping him is slapped away, all Byleth can do is grab at the sheets and stare at the man once again descending over him. 

This time Jeritza is slow as he presses up, slowly making his way from the base of Byleth’s cock to its exposed head. His tongue is pink, Byleth notices detachedly. Most tongues are, but there is something about the contrast of the muscle against the beads of slick being steadily lapped up. 

Byleth is somehow silent through it all except for the occasional hitched breath. Jeritza is much the same, the only sound coming from him being a low quiet humming that vibrates nicely as he first gulps down Byleth’s cock in one go.

It is only then that Byleth lets out a startled gasp, already used to the slow rhythm of tongue Jeritza had set. It's wet. Byleth bucks his hips automatically, biting his chapped lips as Jeritza single handedly holds him down. He bucks his hips again just to feel the pressure. 

Byleth is still staring. He hasn't stopped staring since Jeritza knelt by his feet five minutes ago. His body may be responsive to the physical sensations, and his mind might pipe up with something of notice whenever something new occurs, but Byleth's eyes are laser focused. 

The up and down movement of Jeritza's head, the way his throat muscles flex every time he swallows accumulated saliva. It's all recorded to the back of Byleth's brain, to be turned over later. But still, the thing that holds most of Byleth's attention is Jeritza's hot gaze stopping him from moving. 

Byleth wants to reach out his hand and touch Jeritza. His bulging cheeks, his high nose, his loose hair. He wants to pull Jeritza off of the ground and into his lap. He wants to run his fingers through the soft material of Jeritza's fluffy skirt. 

Byleth wants to kiss him.

But Jeritza is still staring at Byleth with his unreadable eyes, and it's uncomfortably like looking at himself in the mirror. Except he's not a blond and his face is less angular at the edges. 

Byleth also doesn't think he could be as graceful with a dick in his mouth. Jeritza sucks and licks at him like he would one of his sweet delights, never taking Byleth into his throat. It's either a lack of skill or he just doesn't like it. Byleth doesn't mind. Deepthroating always feels like a rush, but there's no incentive for them to end the night so soon. 

Byleth really does want the feeling of Jeritza in his lap though, so he leans forward and pushes the man away from Byleth's leaking cock. It's with a start that he realizes the sheets are torn from where his were gripping them. Strange, Byleth hadn't noticed anything. 

"... What is it?" Jeritza's words cause Byleth to look up from his bed and to Jeritza's pink, wet mouth. It takes a moment for him to process exactly what Jeritza said and another beat passes before Byleth can form a reply. He pats his thighs in what he hopes is a welcoming manner.

"Come up."

Jeritza grunts but complies. It was hard to see it before with Jeritza's arms leaning forward, but the front of his dress is completely soaked with precum. 

"...Well?" Jeritza asks impatiently, a thin eyebrow upturned. Then, before Byleth can do anything, Jeritza slides a few inches sideways from Byleth's lap and starts grinding against his thigh.

Byleth takes the opportunity to snake his arm around Jeritza and touch the full body of his skirt. The fact that Byleth also takes a moment to fondle Jeritza's asscheeks as he himself grinds against Jeritza's left knee is a non issue. 

"You look pretty." 

It's all Byleth can say before Jeritza freezes in his oscillating and orgasms, still fully dressed. A second passes with Byleth's surprise. Then he takes himself in hand and finishes with the thought of Jeritza's open mouth and flushed red face in his mind. 

Byleth opens his eyes, not really noticing how he'd shut them with the force of his own orgasm, to see Jeritza's face an inch away from his. He thinks about the dagger, still sheathed underneath his pillow. He thinks about all the blood running red over both of their hands.

Byleth inches closer and kisses Jeritza softly on the lips.

"Next time you should wear cat ears." Another kiss, still closed mouthed but with teeth. "Also fuck me in the ass." 

A short laugh parts them from each other.

Jeritza's smile is still small but undeniably there as he says "of course". 

**Author's Note:**

> please leave a review on your way out!!!! 
> 
> twitter @gautiercock dms always open


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